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I am at home in full gear: kneepads, elbowpads, wrist guards, mouthguard, helmet and of course, the skates. The skates themselves are the root of my home and the center of my belonging. I listen to them and they listen to me. With them, I feel the rush and energy of a burn pace, the excitement of a good hit, and they are with whom I share most intimately the victory of a triumphant jam. This is my place, this is how I live, this is who I have become. This is the person I have embraced, and who I am proud to be.

I am myself on the track, and I judge myself only by my own limitations. I don’t compare myself to others, or think, ‘Why can’t I be more like her? Why can’t I be as pretty or skinny as her?” None of that is relevant. Though I know I could be better, I also know that wishing for it is no way to make it happen. Wishing and dreaming isn’t the same as doing, and I know that the more I push myself and the harder I train, I will reach my goal one day. It will come, eventually, with practice. Hours and hours of practice. A great skater once told me, “In order to have endurance, you must first endure.” I think that could not be more true. Fighting that internal battle of “Am I good enough?” is irrelevant, because I will only ever be as good as I allow myself to be. If I stop halfway through, I am only hurting my ability to endure.

Who am I? I am every skater who believes in herself. I aim to capture the spirit of the ambitious skater. Though I don’t always match up to my highest expectations, I work as hard as I possibly can to improve. The pain I feel in minor injuries only fuels me to skate faster, train harder, and get up quicker from a big hit. If I can improve, even only by a little bit each day, then I am succeeding.

- Lana GetDirty #450

Roller Derby is Magic

I never was one for team sports- as in, I’ve never really played team sports before, so this whole Roller Derby thing was kind of new for me. I love people, though, and I have a positive outlook on almost everything I set out to do, so I figured, what the heck, this might just be for me. I’ve learned a lot since then. Teamwork is hard, being a part of a league is hard- it takes time, effort, and there are plenty of bumps and bruises along the way (literally and figuratively). All of that is superseded by the mere fact that it is the most rewarding sport I have ever been a part of. I am proud to be a rollergirl, I am proud to be a Brawler, and proud to be a Bomber. There’s something about the game that is just too perfect to describe in words.

Spiritually, I’ve learned a lot about myself. I’ve learned that I CAN be a team player, and that I can interact socially with people. It has done wonders for my self-esteem, my confidence, and my attitude on life. I believe now in myself as an athlete, after almost seven years of being a pretty much sedentary angst ridden, socially awkward teenager.

Physically? I feel amazing. Well, I feel very sore all of the time, and my hamstrings are really tight, and I end up spending fifty dollars a week in copays for physical therapy… But at the end of the day, I feel like I am really making a difference in my life and that I getting stronger and better after every practice… Not all practices make me feel better, just like not every scrimmage was an improvement… Overall, though, I would say that I am feeling myself get just a little stronger. The more I push, I feel small improvements- like I can do one more pushup than last practice, things like that- and that is what really matters.

As SporkofTitan (Potomac Ripper) said, “Roller Derby is magic.”

I know what that means. That means that no matter what, this game is amazing, and this is why we play, and this magical game is what changed my life.

Magic.

- Lana GetDirty #450